Beep Beep Zip Tang

[flashymcflash]

"This is madness!"

"Madness? This is KEYSTONE!"

So rarely does he have a set up that good for such a dated reference, but that's the line the Flash decided on before kicking Weather Wizard in the chest and knocking him out cold. Would he have just punched the guy if he hadn't set him up? Probably, but the kick means commitment to the bit.

Once the lights are out on the last of the Rogues this time around, he takes one zip around to make sure they're separated from their weaponry before the cops take over the crime scene, and the Flash goes about the job of diverting the press from said crime scene. Some cops initially thought he was just being a glory hound, but Wally knew from Barry's complaints how annoying it was when the press demanded answers on an investigation that was still ongoing. Wally knows what he's doing.

Aaaaaand he likes the attention.

"Yes, I found good ol' Captain Cold trying to freeze his way into another bank job, and yes, I put a stop to it. Yes, I did it with panache and yes, the Flash is in full effect. Now, Denise, I believe when last we spoke, you were asking for my personal playlist. I'd like to add 'Poison' by Bell Biv DeVoe to the list, because I'm in that hip-hop smoothed out on the R&B tip kinda mood. Don't worry, I'll get back to getting the Led out soon enough."

It's good to be the Flash.

Comments

[flame_bird]

There is a message waiting for him later, "Nice interview."

That's it, nothing more but Bette certainly does sound amused.

[flashymcflash]

The text is returned instantly.

"Did they get my good side? Wait, what am I saying? They're all good sides."

[flame_bird]

"You can't tell in that thing anyway. Isn't that the point?"

She should be studying but, well, this is okay, right?

[flashymcflash]

"The thing has good sides, too. Especially the back side, so I'm told by the octogenarian I saved who got a little fresh. Do you concur?"

[flame_bird]

"Fishing for compliments much?"

[flashymcflash]

"Always, so you might as well just say them all the time."

[flame_bird]

"I'm not as quick as you are with this stuff."

"Of course who is?"

[jesse_quick]

As the cameras click, there's a breeze that rushes through, ruffling hair and skirts, and suddenly there's Jesse, mugging behind the Flash in what could be considered the world's fastest photobomb.

She disappears a second later, only to reappear leaning up against a nearby building.

A tiny wave of the fingers as she watches the press mill about.

[flashymcflash]

Flash responds with the world's fastest nose-thumbing finger-waggling thing. That probably has a name. Maybe he'll look it up sometime.

"That's about all I've got time for, ladies and germs, since I'm sure Gorilla Grodd is up to no good somewhere. Somebody's gotta put the kibosh on his apey schemes, and it's sure not gonna be you, is it, Floogleman?"

A smattering of laughter as Flash suddenly appears behind Floogleman. "I tease because I love. Nice piece on the HeadSTART programs last week. Let the record show that the Flash supports them. Now that's all, folks! I'm sure I'll be seein' you again real soonlike!"

With that, he's instantly next to Jesse.

"What, you don't get enough camera time with the day job?"

[jesse_quick]

With a vanna-white-style wave at the bright yellow hotpants and red shirt that make up her costume, Jesse just shakes her head.

"Yeah, because this is the newest rage for CEOs. Though it might get me out of meetings if I showed up in this..."

Thankfully the press seem to be dispersing without bothering the two of them, but Jesse's speaking quietly just in case.

"And besides, how could I let you do yet another one of your press things without poking at you? You know how you get when your ego runs unchecked."

[flashymcflash]

"Hey, you know the drill - the press needs their soundbites, just doing their jobs, and the more you distract them while the police do the cleanup, the better the cops like you. It's a whole thing!"

And yes, his eyes followed her Vanna-White wave at her, uh, form-fitting outfit.

"Besides, my ego really digs running unchecked. It's kinda like me that way. Well, I guess it IS me, but you know what I mean. Let's not get all Freudian here."

[jesse_quick]

"That really should be your super-ego. Because, you know, super? You're super?"

Nudge nudge with the elbow, because it's hilarious, really, and Jesse likes the dorky jokes.

[flashymcflash]

To her credit, Wally does smile at that. Then runs with it. Because he's the Flash.

"Has there been a guy calling himself Super-Ego yet? Has Superman had to fight that guy? I imagine the costume would involve a lot of pants-stuffing..."

[barbican_extras]

"Yoo hoo! Flash dear!" There's a white-haired lady waving from the back of the press crowd. She holds up a large brown paper bag. "Baked fresh this morning."

There is a faint smell of cookies in the air.

[flashymcflash]

The way to Wally West's heart is through food. Desserts in particular. He has a particularly unfair metabolism advantage.

So he's there in an instant. "Well, what have we here, ma'am? You shouldn't have, but I'm glad you did!"

[barbican_extras]

The old lady beams and opens the bag so he can see for himself. "Almond sugar cookies, dear. You need to keep up your strength!" She pats his face in a decidedly grandmotherly fashion. "It's the least I can do after you saved my husband last week. Arthur Johnson, dear," she adds. "That horrible bridge accident caused by that nasty Captain Cold person."

[flashymcflash]

"Artie! I remember him! He was the guy who slipped over the side and caught a grip on the railing just long enough for me to grab him. Sprightly man! How's he doing? He get his prescription refilled? I know his pharmacy was giving him some business about that and trying to blame it on the new health care law."

[barbican_extras]

"Oh, he's doing just fine, dear. So kind of you to ask." She holds the bag out to him, the cookies inside sliding a little with the movement. Each cookie, he can now see, is embossed with a little lightning bolt. "Those silly people at the pharmacy were being ridiculously stubborn, but they saw reason." Mrs. Johnson gives him a satisfied smile. "Especially after I got on the Tweeter and talked about how you saved my Artie from Captain Cold, and what a shame it would be if the pharmacy couldn't give him his heart pills."

A grandmother who can use social media. A force to be reckoned with.

[flashymcflash]

Flash takes the bag, admires the decor, and starts munching on one as he listens to the Tale of Arthur Johnson's Travails.

"Good on you, ma'am. That's what the Tweeter is for. You must be Enid, then? Artie told me all about you, and I have to say he undersold your talent with baked goods. These are tres fabu!"

[prettybirdofprey]

There's a soft crackle from his Justice League com before a familiar voice sounds in his ear. "Black Canary to Flash. You available to help with a rush evac?"

In the background, he can hear not screams, but an odd gulping chorus, as if the Canary is surrounded by people desperately trying not to make a noise.

[flashymcflash]

Wally responds immediately.

"Where do you need me?"

[prettybirdofprey]

"Dominican Republic." She makes a ssssshhing noise, but not directed at him. "I've got kids here who need to get out. Oracle, tell 'im where we are."

[oracle_watching]

A synthesized voice comes online, giving the Flash the GPS coordinates. "Hostiles present," Oracle warns. "Perimeter defenses engaged."

[flashymcflash]

"What kinda hostiles?" Flash barks as the strange sounds of footsteps on water echo through the comm lines.

[oracle_watching]

"Metahuman - manipulation of electricity," comes the quick response. "Perimeter defenses also include concertina wire."